now in this article, i’ll teach you how to give your girl better sex. the answer: give her work to do. she doesnt just lay there. she has to not only be receiving our dick, but also doing something else to aid in the sex. maybe it’s rubbing my balls. or patting them with a little pain, or maybe its pushing her breast together, or she is told the repeatedly kiss you or maybe she is spreading her butt open for you. in my experience, girls has said with their mouths that they like certain responsibilities.
Of course. This is a crucial concept that shifts the dynamic from a one-sided performance to a collaborative experience. Here is an article written in that same direct, confident voice, explaining the power of giving her “work” to do.
The Participation Trophy: The Secret to Making Her a Part of the Action
Alright, let’s address one of the biggest myths out there: the idea that a woman’s role in sex is to be a passive receiver. Too many guys think their job is to be the performer, the one doing all the work, while she just lies there and enjoys the show. That’s not a partnership; it’s a performance. And it’s a recipe for mediocre sex.
If you want to take your intimate life to the next level, you need to change the dynamic. The answer is simple: give her work to do.
I’m not talking about making her do all the thrusting. I’m talking about giving her a specific, secondary task—a responsibility—that she has to focus on while you’re having sex. It sounds counterintuitive, but the moment she stops just receiving your dick and starts participating in the act, her entire experience changes. She becomes an active part of the engine, not just a passenger.
In my experience, women not only respond to this; they crave it. They’ve told me with their own mouths how much they enjoy having a specific responsibility during sex. It focuses their mind and deepens their investment in the moment.
So, what kind of work are we talking about? It’s simple, focused, and powerful. Here are a few examples to get you started.
1. The Ball Handler
This is a classic and for good reason. While you’re in a position like missionary, give her a simple command: “Take care of my balls.” This can mean a few things. Maybe it’s gently rubbing them. Maybe it’s cupping them. Or maybe, if you’ve established that you both enjoy it, it’s patting or lightly slapping them with a bit of pain for intensity. This simple task gives her a point of focus. She’s not just lying there; she’s actively contributing to your pleasure, which in turn makes her feel more connected to the act and more turned on herself.
2. The Presentation
In a position where her hands are free, tell her to present her body to you. A common and effective one is, “Push your tits together for me.” She is now actively participating in creating the visual that’s turning you on. This isn’t just for you; it’s for her. It gives her a role in her own objectification, which can be incredibly empowering and a massive turn-on. She is consciously making herself into the spectacle, which engages her mind in a powerful way. Another variation, especially for anal, is the command: “Spread your ass open for me.” It puts her in complete, active participation of the entry.
3. The Kissing Mandate
This one is intensely intimate. In the middle of a deep, rhythmic thrust, you look her in the eyes and give her the command: “Keep kissing me. Don’t stop.” Now, her focus is split. She is processing the physical sensation of you inside her while also being responsible for maintaining a constant state of intimacy through kissing. It forces a level of mental engagement that is all-consuming. She can’t let her mind wander. She is locked into the moment with you, both physically and emotionally.
Why This Works
Giving her “work” to do accomplishes three things:
- It Engages Her Mind: It prevents her from being a passive observer. She has a task, a focus point. This deepens her immersion in the experience.
- It Creates a Power Dynamic: You are taking the lead, and she is following your direction. This clear dynamic can be a huge turn-on for many women, as it allows them to let go and simply exist within the structure you’ve created.
- It Makes Sex a Team Sport: It reframes the act as something you are building together. Her actions directly impact your pleasure, and your actions directly impact hers. You are two people working in concert to create a single, intense experience.
Stop thinking of sex as something you do to her. Start thinking of it as something you do with her. Give her a job. You’ll be surprised how eagerly she clocks in.